Bizarre Baseball Culture: SHORTSTOP SQUAD (AKA “Ripken, Larkin, Jeter and A-Rod fight Faux-Godzilla”)

Posted on October 25, 2013 by danglickman

In Bizarre Baseball Culture, I take a look at some of the more unusual places where baseball has reared it’s head in pop culture and fiction.

In the last years of the 20th century and the first years of the 21st, there existed a company called “Ultimate Sports Force”. It is gone now, existing only in old websites and undeleted news items, but in it’s day, it was a staple advertisement in things like Sports Illustrated for Kids.

What was “Ultimate Sports Force”, you ask?

Ultimate Sports Force was a comic company that made books in which professional athletes were superheroes, that’s what! They had licenses with MLB, NBA, NFL and others, and they made comics that involved them saving the world. And then, like a shooting star across the sky, they were gone.

But, oh, man, the stuff they left behind. I’ve come into possession of many of their great products, and while their quality varies from “surprisingly good” to “OH-DEAR-GOD-KILL-IT-WITH-FIRE”, they all represent a special point in our history, a time when we could think of our sports heroes as actual superheroes, and not individuals who got into arguments, used PEDs, had tumultuous love lives, politics we disagree with or other flaws. No, Ultimate Sports Force was the last Golden Age before we all became so jaded.

Perhaps the crown jewel of Ultimate Sports Force’s non-team-affiliated content was Shortstop Squad. Truly a marvel of the Bizarre Baseball Culture arts, it paid tribute to those that went before and followed in their traditions, as Cal Ripken led his team of Barry Larkin, Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez against a fish-monster that basically is meant to be fish-Godzilla.

You may think I’m being sarcastic, and you are probably right, but, well, this is SHORTSTOP SQUAD, so your logic is irrelevant.

After all, just LOOK at this cover:

Your mind is now blown.

So, let’s get started with Shortstop Squad #1 from 1999… after the jump, of course:

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Headlines from around the Continuum: October 25, 2013

Posted on October 25, 2013 by danglickman

Baseball-related headlines from the Newseum:

(Note that I try to copy the style of the paper as well, hence why some are in ALL CAPS while others aren’t. Also, I ignored extremely basic headlines like “World Series Preview” or “Cardinals Win”)

Story: Cardinals even up series with 4-2 win in Game 2

News-Gazette (Champaign, Ill.): TURNING THE TABLES

The Hawk Eye (Burlington, Iowa): A big pick-me-up

Portland (Maine) Press Herald: One for the birds: Cardinals pull even

Boston Globe: Reversal of fortune at Fenway

Boston Herald: HOUSE OF CARDS

Herald News (Fall River, Mass.): OUTGUNNED

Cape Cod Times: Fall in Fenway

Joplin (Mo.) Globe: YOUNG GUNS

Springfield (Mo.) News-Leader: CARDINAL WAY

St. Louis Post-Dispatch: SAFELY HOME (this was the Sports Page headline, shown on ESPN this morning)

Providence Journal: Not enough this time

El Expreso de Campeche (San Francisco de Campeche, Mexico): PICOTAZO (roughly translates as “PECK” or “PECKED”)

(The rest are rather generic)

Headlines from around the Continuum: October 24, 2013

Posted on October 24, 2013 by danglickman

(Note that I try to copy the style of the paper as well, hence why some are in ALL CAPS while others aren’t. Also, I ignored extremely basic headlines like “World Series Preview”)

Story: Red Sox beat Cardinals in Game 1, 8-1

Hartford (CT) Courant: Hot Start On A Cold Night

Belleville (IL) News-Democrat: Rough start for Wainwright, Cardinals

The News-Gazette (Champaign, IL): FOR PETE’S SAKE (with image of Pete Kozma’s error)

Messenger-Inquirer (Owensboro, Ky.): RED SOCKED

Boston Globe: Red Sox are the whole show

The Herald News (Fall River, Mass.): Coming out swinging

Cape Cod Times: Red Sox bring it

Taunton (Mass.) Daily Gazette: STRIKING EARLY

News Tribune (Jefferson City, Mo.): CARDS SOCKED

News-Leader (Springfield, Mo.): FENWAY FIASCO

(The St. Louis Post-Dispatch had a large ad at the top talking about a poster giveaway tomorrow, and a small cartoon at the bottom depicting a Cardinal having a ball hit it’s head with the caption “Beantown Bash”.)

Concord (NH) Monitor: Strong opening statement

Texarkana Gazette: LIVING THE DREAM (on how Texarkana natives Will Middlebrooks and Michael Wacha are both in the World Series)

El Universal (Cartagena, Colombia): Los Medias Rojas pegaron primero (roughly “The Red Sox strike first”)

Vanguardia (Saltillo, Mexico): !PEGA BOSTON PRIMERO! (Roughly translates as “Boston hits first!”)

(Most others, including those from other countries, are either extremely similar to the above ones or are extremely boring.)

Bizarre Baseball Culture (Book Review): “Brittle Innings” by Michael Bishop

Posted on October 23, 2013 by danglickman

In Bizarre Baseball Culture, I take a look at some of the more unusual places where baseball has reared it’s head in pop culture and fiction.

1816 was the so-called “Year Without a Summer”, as a series of events (including the ash from a very large volcanic eruption in Indonesia) caused temperatures around the world to plunge. Against this backdrop, a small group of English writers and poets had their summer vacation at the Villa Diodati near Lake Geneva ruined by record cold and wet weather. Stuck inside the Swiss manor, one of their members, Lord Byron, suggested they try their hand at writing ghost stories. One of them, a young woman named Mary Shelley, came up with an idea that would eventually become Frankenstein: or, The Modern Prometheus. It differed from other scary stories in one major aspect: instead of having the monster come from magic or religion, it was about a monster created by mankind, by science. In fact, some say that it invented science fiction as a genre.

So, perhaps it isn’t surprising that eventually Bizarre Baseball Culture would come across the Frankenstein Monster, but it is surprising that it comes in Brittle Innings by Michael Bishop, as opposed to a baseball episode of The Munsters or some sort of obscure comic. Because, you see, Brittle Innings, published in 1994, is an honest-to-goodness classy novel written for adults that doesn’t even advertise the fact that it’s unusual, and it’s premise is simple: what if Mary Shelley had merely been an editor of the tale of Frankenstein and his monster, and what if the Monster survived, moved to America, and took up baseball?

Okay, maybe that premise isn’t that simple. Depends on your definition of “simple”, I guess. Still, go below the jump for more:

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Headlines from around the Continuum: October 23, 2013

Posted on October 23, 2013 by danglickman

Baseball-related headlines from the Newseum:

(Note that I try to copy the style of the paper as well, hence why some are in ALL CAPS while others aren’t. Also, I ignored extremely basic headlines like “World Series Preview”)

Story: World Series starts tonight

Hartford Courant (Hartford, CT): RED TIDE RISING

Honolulu Star-Advertiser: WORLD SERIES FACE-OFF/THE PRIDE OF HAWAII (no doubt referring to Shane Victorino)

The Pantagraph (Bloomington, IL): Plenty of history in Cardinals-Red Sox matchup

Portland (Maine) Press: All eyes on Fenway as Sox host Game 1

The Sun Chronicle (Attleboro, Mass.): Wait until this year

Boston Globe: ONE BIG TEAM/Red Sox and bombing-scarred Boston rise together

Boston Herald: WELCOME TO OUR WORLD

Metro- Boston Edition: THE HUNT FOR THREE

Cape Cod Times: It’s hitting home

Standard-Times (New Bedford, Mass.): ALL EYES ON SOX

(The St. Louis Post Dispatch didn’t have a headline- just a big picture of Fenway Park above the fold.)

Buffalo News: Boston rises above horror

Providence Journal: LIVING THE DREAM

USA TODAY: CLOSE SHAVES IN THIS SERIES? NOT LIKELY (with pictures of bearded Red Sox players)

National Post (Toronto): ACES WILD (on the starting pitchers and others to watch in the series)

El Universal (Cartagena, Colombia): ¡Play ball!

El Informador (Guadalajara, Mexico): Retoman rivalidad (roughly translated as “Rivalry renewed”)

Vanguardia (Saltillo, Mexico): ¡Chocan los mejores! (roughly translated as “The best collide!”)

El Expreso de Campeche (San Francisco de Campeche, Mexico): QUE INICIE LA FIESTA (“Let the party begin!”)

De Volksrant (Amsterdam, Netherlands): Big in the U.S.A. (on Aruban/Dutch Xander Bogaerts being in the World Series)

El Nuevo Dia (San Juan, Puerto Rico): Choque de titanes en Boston (“Clash of titans in Boston.”)

El Nacional (Caracas, Venezuela): Fiesta mundial en Boston (Either “Global Party in Boston” or “World festivities in Boston”)

The 2013 World Series Preview/Prediction Spectacular

Posted on October 23, 2013 by danglickman

It’s time to preview the 2013 World Series!

…After the jump, of course:

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My Votes in Baseball Prospectus’ “2013 Internet Baseball Awards”

Posted on October 20, 2013 by danglickman

Baseball Prospectus runs the Internet Baseball Awards, the oldest such internet-voted awards in baseball, open to anyone with any type of account at Prospectus. Amazingly though, this is the first year I’m actually voting in them. I have no idea why. I think it may be because I never got around to getting one of the free accounts at BP. I am ashamed.

Anyway, here’s how I voted this year (using a combination of statistics, my own eyes, and a bit of my gut), and keep in mind that you too can vote:

AL MVP (in order): Miguel Cabrera, Mike Trout, Josh Donaldson, Chris Davis, Robinson Cano, Max Scherzer, Evan Longoria, Manny Machado, Felix Hernandez, Ben Zobrist.

I pick Cabrera over Trout, Donaldson and Davis due to his importance to the team, despite the fact that under advanced statistics Trout and Donaldson both had better years, WAR-wise. In addition, I have to wonder how well Cabrera might have been if he was healthy all season instead of completely hobbled in the final weeks. Also, it’s what my gut says. And my gut is stupid like this.

NL MVP (in order): Andrew McCutchen, Paul Goldschmidt, Carlos Gomez, Matt Carpenter, Clayton Kershaw, Joey Votto, Yadier Molina, Jose Fernandez, Cliff Lee, Andrelton Simmons

This is far less based on gut and far more based on statistics. Andrelton Simmons’ place in 10th is more because of his great fielding play, by the way.

AL Cy Young (in order): Max Scherzer, Felix Hernandez, Yu Darvish, Hisashi Iwakuma, Anibal Sanchez

Not that much I have to justify here. Note: Iwakuma would have won the “Cy Underrated” award, if such a thing existed.

NL Cy Young (in order): Clayton Kershaw, Jose Fernandez, Cliff Lee, Adam Wainwright, Matt Harvey

Like the AL Cy Young, there isn’t much I have to justify here, especially at the very top. I was originally thinking of having Fernandez be four or five and perhaps Wainwright be two or three, but I’m feeling confident in this ordering and the stats more-or-less back me up. More-or-less.

AL Rookie of the Year (in order): Wil Myers, Jose Iglesias, Chris Archer, Sonny Gray, David Lough

The AL batch of newcomers this year was sort of “meh”, especially when compared to the National League.

NL Rookie of the Year (in order): Jose Fernandez, Yasiel Puig, Hyun-Jin Ryu, Gerrit Cole, Julio Teheran

Michael Wacha would probably be on this list if I included the postseason.

AL Manager of the Year (in order): John Farrell, Joe Girardi, Terry Francona

NL Manager of the Year (in order): Clint Hurdle, Don Mattingly, Mike Matheny

Manager voting is more-or-less based entirely on gut and impressions… so, uh, this is what my impression of how these guys did and what my gut tells me.

Mr. Octobers of Yesterday (October 17, 2013)

Posted on October 18, 2013 by danglickman

Yesterday’s Mr. Octobers both come from the Red Sox: Mike Napoli, who went 3-4 with a HR, and Koji Uehara for his 5-out save with two Ks.

Standings (PP= Position Player, P= Pitcher):

P Justin Verlander– 14

PP Carlos Beltran– 11

P Clayton Kershaw– 11

P Max Scherzer– 11

P Koji Uehara– 11

P Zack Greinke– 10

P Adam Wainwright– 9

PP David Ortiz– 8

P Michael Wacha– 8

PP Jhonny Peralta – 8

PP Matt Holliday– 8

PP Adrian Gonzalez– 8

PP Shane Victorino– 6

PP David Freese – 6

PP Miguel Cabrera– 6

P Anibal Sanchez – 5

P Hyun-jin Ryu– 5

PP Yasiel Puig– 5

P Carlos Martinez– 5

P John Lackey– 5

PP Austin Jackson– 5

P Doug Fister– 5

PP Mike Napoli- 5

P Sonny Gray-3

P Gerrit Cole– 3

PP Pedro Alvarez– 3

P Jon Lester– 3

P Mike Minor– 3

PP Hanley Ramirez– 3

PP Yoenis Cespedes– 3

P Jason Grilli– 3

PP Carl Crawford– 3

P Chris Capuano– 3

PP Seth Smith– 3

P Dan Otero– 3

PP Jose Lobaton-3

P Jake McGee-3

PP Juan Uribe-3

PP (Position Player) Russell Martin– 1

P (Pitcher) Francisco Liriano– 1

PP Desmond Jennings– 1

P Alex Cobb– 1

Mr. Octobers of Yesterday (October 14, 2013)

Posted on October 15, 2013 by danglickman

Yesterday’s Mr. Octobers are Hyun-jin Ryu and Yasiel Puig. Ryu went 7 shutout innings and gave up just three hits, while Puig went 2-3 with an RBI on his crazy triple, where he was able to get to third standing up despite spending his time getting out of the box admiring the hit while flipping his bat.

Standings (PP= Position Player, P= Pitcher):

PP Carlos Beltran– 11

P Clayton Kershaw– 11

P Max Scherzer– 11

P Justin Verlander– 9

P Adam Wainwright– 9

PP David Ortiz– 8

P Michael Wacha– 8

PP Jhonny Peralta – 8

P Koji Uehara– 6

PP Shane Victorino– 6

PP David Freese – 6

PP Miguel Cabrera– 6

P Zack Greinke– 5

P Anibal Sanchez – 5

P Hyun-jin Ryu- 5

PP Yasiel Puig- 5

P Sonny Gray-3

PP Adrian Gonzalez– 3

P Gerrit Cole– 3

PP Pedro Alvarez– 3

P Jon Lester– 3

P Mike Minor– 3

PP Hanley Ramirez– 3

PP Yoenis Cespedes– 3

P Jason Grilli– 3

PP Carl Crawford– 3

P Chris Capuano– 3

PP Seth Smith– 3

P Dan Otero– 3

PP Matt Holliday-3

PP Jose Lobaton-3

P Jake McGee-3

PP Juan Uribe-3

PP (Position Player) Russell Martin– 1

P (Pitcher) Francisco Liriano– 1

PP Desmond Jennings– 1

P Alex Cobb– 1

Mr. Octobers of Yesterday (October 13, 2013)

Posted on October 14, 2013 by danglickman

There was just one game yesterday, but it felt like two: There was the game where Max Scherzer shut down the Red Sox, and then the game that saw David Ortiz hit a game-tying grand slam and that set up a later walk-off hit by Jarrod Saltalamacchia.

Needless to say, Scherzer and Ortiz are the Mr. Octobers of yesterday.

Standings (PP= Position Player, P= Pitcher):

PP Carlos Beltran– 11

P Clayton Kershaw– 11

P Max Scherzer– 11

P Justin Verlander– 9

P Adam Wainwright– 9

PP David Ortiz– 8

P Michael Wacha– 8

PP Jhonny Peralta – 8

P Koji Uehara– 6

PP Shane Victorino– 6