Category Archives: MLB

Roy Halladay retires, the three great managers inducted, I feel old

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I swear I’m going to get up the latest Bizarre Baseball Culture soon, but today has brought two major news stories:

A) Joe Torre, Tony La Russa and Bobby Cox have been inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame by the Veterans’ Committee. Marvin Miller wasn’t, but that’s another story.

B) Roy Halladay, the Doctor, has announced his retirement, signing a one-day deal with Toronto to end his career as a Blue Jay.

So, for those keeping score, that means perhaps the three greatest managers of the past 30 years are now in the Hall of Fame, and perhaps the best pitcher of the last 10 or 11 years has retired.

It’s an interesting contrast when you look at it, because while almost everyone expected the three managers to get in the Hall of Fame, it’s unlikely many people expected Roy Halladay would have gone out with such a whimper. Injuries and the cruelty that comes with growing old led to his sharp decline in 2012 and 2013, while the Phillies lack of hitting and the sheer randomness of October left him without a World Series ring.

It’s a stretch to compare Halladay to Sandy Koufax, but there are some similarities, as both came to the big leagues young, with their first few years being rocky as their raw talent was often unable to make up for inexperience. But then, something clicked, and for a span (five or so years for Koufax, ten or so years for Halladay, albeit with a blip in 2004 when he was hurt) they became the best pitchers of their generations. Then, however, injuries forced them into premature retirements (Koufax at only 30, while Halladay at 36 after two years of decline that Koufax never had).

Another thing they will have in common? The Hall of Fame. Matthew Pouliot over at HardballTalk has a good summing up of why, but it essentially comes down to how good he was over that 10-year span, as well as the fact that, for his era, he was an exceptional pitcher, for example throwing almost double the amount of complete games as the next pitcher who remains active.

Tomorrow: The Mariners Fight Bigfoot

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Due to the shocking Robinson Cano signing, I’m going to be sending in a pinch-hitter tomorrow, replacing the would-be Bizarre Baseball Culture installment I was planning that featured Ozzie Smith and Tony the Tiger (seriously) with a very special installment that features two comics from 2002 in which the Mariners fight a Sasquatch invasion.

You have been warned.

Yesterday was nuts

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Well, that escalated quickly.

You know how I made that post about how crazy it could get in the winter meetings? Y’know, with the name of the Mystery Team, the free agents and traded players all redacted? Well, as yesterday went on, it became a lot less likely and a lot less intentionally funny.

So, for those of you who missed it, this happened yesterday:

  • The Orioles traded the ever hot-and-cold Jim Johnson to the Athletics for Jemile Weeks, a prospect, and perhaps some magic beans. This was late Monday, but I really didn’t hear about it until I woke up on Tuesday.
  • The Red Sox signed AJ Pierzynski.
  • The Tigers signed Joe Nathan.
  • The Rays, Reds and Diamondbacks had a three-way trade that ended with Tampa getting Ryan Hanigan and Heath Bell.
  • It came out that that Mariners apparently are in on Robinson Cano.
  • The Padres traded Luke Gregerson to the A’s for Seth Smith.
  • The Astros got Dexter Fowler from the Rockies.
  • The Marlins signed Jarrod Saltalamacchia to a three-year deal.
  • The Yankees signed Jacoby Ellsbury to a seven-year deal, $153 million dollar deal that is absolutely absurd given his injury history and the fact that he’s 30 years old.
  • The Rockies signed Justin Morneau to a two-year deal.
  • Oh, and we found out this morning that Paul Konerko will return for the White Sox this year, after speculation he would retire, and that Brandon Phillips will likely be back with the Reds, after speculation he would be traded.

Got all of that?

THE MYSTERY TEAM WILL BE THE ███████

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Next week, the Winter Meetings begin in Orlando. And while we no doubt will see funny images on MLB Network like Kevin Millar hanging out with Goofy and Brian Kenny trying to explain to Captain Jack Sparrow why the win stat must be sent to Davey Jones’ locker, ultimately, it will be about one team. What team is that? Why, it’s the ██████████████!

Here’s how it will happen, of course:

The ██████████████, after all, will no doubt be the ones that will be rumored to be signing ███████████ on the first day, and the team that will be behind the massive three-team trade involving ██████████████████, █████████████, and ██████████████, which will feature ███████ and top prospect ███████, amongst others. Everybody will think the deal is nuts, but some will praise the ███████████’s GM, █████ ██████████, for his initiative and brilliant thinking. Others will call for his firing.

Meanwhile, the ██████████████’s current star, ███████ ███████, will then make a funny comment on Twitter about how he fell asleep in his █████████ home a few hours ago and is honestly wondering if he missed anything, and then make a second comment saying that this is the first time he heard about the ███████████ trade. It’ll be retweeted by everyone and become a meme, with people talking about how “█████████ is sleeping, make sure you do your deals now” or what-not. Everyone will be sick of it within 48 hours and it will then be resigned to the dustbin of baseball memes.

Then, however, a lull will fall upon Orlando for most of the second day. Instagrams of Joe Maddon walking around EPCOT and Alex Rodriguez showing up for reasons beyond mortal minds will fill the void while Ken Rosenthal is forced to tell Twitter people that A) he is tall enough to ride Space Mountain so stop asking and B) he’s too busy to go to Disney World right now. But then, the ██████████████ will be rumored to have been talking to Scott Boras. But about who? The speculation will go throughout the day, until finally, we hear that █████████ has signed a deal! Except, it’ll turn out that that report is actually a fake account, and that ██████████ is actually going to somebody completely different.

Overnight, people will start talking about how lots of pizza is arriving at the ██████████████’s suite, and wonder whether this is proof that ██████████████ will be signing ████████. Nothing will really materialize, but, hey, it’ll kill time.

Then, later on, the ██████████████ will make that one final splash, signing ██████████. People will instantly declare them to be World Series favorites…

….and then, in 2014, they’ll miss the playoffs.

Whoops. Well, at least the ██████████████ will always have their great 2013-2014 offseason to remember.

The Phil Hughes deal isn’t as crazy as you think

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As you no doubt have found out by now, Phil Hughes has signed with the Minnesota Twins. On one hand, you likely thought this was a crazy and reckless move by the Twins, throwing 24 million dollars at a pitcher who has been wildly inconsistent and who was 4-14 last year with an abominable 5.19 ERA. At least Ricky Nolasco, the other big signing for the Twins in their attempt to make their rotation better, was good last season, after all.

But, get this: this could actually end up being a good move. Maybe.

For one, keep in mind the type of pitcher Hughes is. He’s a fly ball pitcher. Last year, 46.5% of balls hit off Hughes ended up as fly balls, according to FanGraphs. That’s a lot, and it is especially dangerous in stadiums like the new Yankee Stadium, which is a hitters park that at times seems to turn routine fly balls into unexpected home runs. Compare that to Target Field, however, where the opposite seems to happen: if I had a quarter for every time it looked like Joe Mauer had just hit one over the wall only for it to fall short (either turning into a double or a fly-out, depending on the outfielder and the part of the stadium he hit it to), I’d have many quarters.

It’s entirely possible that, with more of his games in a more spacious stadium, Hughes will be able to cut down on the gopher-balls and deflate his ERA quite a bit. Although it’s admittedly a small sample size (and he was facing Twins hitters), Hughes’ regular-season numbers in his three games and 21.1 innings at Target Field seem to back this assessment up. He is a career 2.53 ERA pitcher in those three games, and gave up just one HR (That’s one HR every 21.1 innings, compared to one HR every 5.015 innings in the current Yankee Stadium). If Hughes can replicate anything close to that performance when he pitches in Minnesota wearing a Twins’ jersey, he could prove to be a reliable two or three starter for the Twins, and certainly an improvement over the revolving door they had last season.

And, what’s more, there is also the fact that at times, Phil Hughes’ roller-coaster career has climbed very high. Back in 2010, for example, he was an All-Star who went 18-8 (more on that next sentence). As recently as 2012, he won 16 games, although, as Brian Kenny would tell you, that more-or-less tells you nothing (and, what’s more, he also lost 13 games). Could Hughes be heading for another upward trend? Well, that has yet to be seen, and the answer may well make the Twins look like geniuses (or fools).

Random Thing: Hideo Nomo’s Coors Field No-No

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Hideo Nomo became the first Japanese player to be on the HOF ballot this year, and while he won’t make it, he definitely deserves to be on the ballot. So, to celebrate that, here’s video of the time Nomo threw a no-hitter in pre-humidor Coors Field.

Bizarre Baseball Culture: McGwire, Sosa and Friends fight Tree Monsters in “Cosmic Slam”

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In Bizarre Baseball Culture, I take a look at some of the more unusual places where baseball has reared it’s head in pop culture and fiction.

I’m coming to you from the Auxiliary Headquarters of the Continuum… AKA a Living Room instead of my usual Family Room or Bedroom writing area, due to the great Wi-Fi Crisis of 2013. The reason I have braved such perils is simple: Cosmic Slam. The sequel to Shortstop Squad, and another great epic from the folks at Ultimate Sports Entertainment (AKA “Ultimate Sports Force”). Just as Shortstop Squad brought us late-90s shortstops fighting monsters and aliens, Cosmic Slam does the same with late 1990s sluggers. Jeff Bagwell, Sammy Sosa, David Justice and Mark McGwire all grace the cover, and Gary Sheffield, Bobby Bonilla and Frank Thomas all show up in the story as well.

It also involves Bagwell complaining about missing a fishing trip, Sosa making a corked bat joke, Greg Maddux‘s fastball being insulted, and of course, the making of a baseball bat out of the body of your defeated foes.

No, I’m not joking about the last one. Seriously, that really happens.

So, place your tongue firmly in cheek and go below the jump for Cosmic Slam.

Continue reading →

Your Offseason Baseball Viewing Listings for November 16, 2013 has Asia Series, Arizona Fall League Finals and Australian Action

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The great Wi-Fi crisis continues, and thus I am able to only place this lonely post up today. Still, it’s going to be a great day of Offseason Ball, with further Asia Series play, the Arizona Fall League finals, and also some Australian League action.

(All Times ET)

11 PM (Friday): Asia Series, Canberra Cavalry (2012/13 Australian Champions) vs. EDA Rhinos (CPBL Runner-Ups). Will be streamed here.

12:35 AM: Australian Baseball League,  Adelaide Bite at Melbourne Aces. Will be streamed here.

2:00 AM: Australian Baseball League, Sydney Blue Sox at Brisbane Bandits. Will be streamed here.

5:30 AM: Asia Series, Uni-President Lions (CPBL Champions) vs. Fortitudo Bologna (European Cup Champions). Will be streamed here.

3:00 PM: Arizona Fall League Finals, Mesa Solar Sox (Angels, A’s, Cubs, Nationals, Tigers) at Surprise Saguaros (Brewers, Indians, Orioles, Rangers, Red Sox). On MLB Network and the AFL website.

10:00 PM: Australian Baseball League, Sydney Blue Sox at Brisbane Bandits. Will be streamed here.

10:05 PM: Australian Baseball League,  Adelaide Bite at Melbourne Aces. Will be streamed here.

Your Offseason Baseball Viewing Listings for November 15, 2013 has Asia Series and Australian Baseball Action

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The Wi-Fi apocalypse of 2013 isn’t done yet, but I’ve figured out a way to get enough Wi-Fi to jot this out quick, the return of Offseason Baseball Viewing Listings.

11:00 PM (Thursday): Asia Series, Bologna (European Cup Champion) vs. Samsung Lions (KBO Champions). Will be streamed here.

3:30 AM: Australian Baseball League, Sydney Blue Sox at Brisbane Bandits. Will likely be streamed at ABL website.

3:35 AM: Australian Baseball League, Adelaide Bite at Melbourne Aces. Will likely be streamed at ABL website.

5 AM: Asia Series, EDA Rhinos (CPBL Runner-Ups) vs. Tohoku Rakuten Golden Eagles (NPB champions). Will be streamed here.

11 PM: Asia Series, Canberra Cavalry (2012/13 Australian Champions) vs. EDA Rhinos (CPBL Runner-Ups). Will be streamed here.

Yankees to play exhibition games in Panama to honor Mariano Rivera

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This is both classy and, of course, plays into my fascination with International Baseball.