Another book I’m reviewing in eBook form, this is 2007’s The 25 Greatest Sports Conspiracy Theories of All Time, by Elliott Kalb. While not just about baseball, at least ten of the “conspiracies” that Kalb talks examines are focused on baseball, and another (the “Michael Jordan’s first retirement was actually a gambling suspension” theory) involves baseball.
(JUMP)
Jose Fernandez outdid himself again, as the young Marlin struck out 14 over 8 innings while giving up just three hits and a walk, while also getting an RBI on a sacrifice. Not bad for somebody who only a few days ago turned 21.
Standings, as always, after the jump:
Baseball Continuum bumper stickers are now a thing. So are T-Shirts, but there aren’t as many of those.
So, yeah, keep an eye open for more updates on how YOU can get a bumper sticker (as well as, y’know, what they look like).
In which I write Haiku-style poetry about a potpourri of baseball cards I found in a value pack. Because, well, it’s my blog.
1992 Fleer Bill Pecota
He’s Bill Pecota
Has a sabermetric stat
that’s named after him
While checking eBay for a share to Rochester Community Baseball (no luck!), I instead came across this.
If you don’t want to look at it or the link has gone dead, here’s what it is:
It’s a coffee pot that belonged to Cy Young‘s estate, and thus, presumably, Cy Young himself. Yes, you too can pour coffee from the same pot as the winningest pitcher of all time for the low, low price of $999! You may think that price absurd, but you are forgetting that you would be having coffee from the same pot as A BASEBALL GOD. Just like how you will be getting the WORKSMANSHIP OF A BASEBALL GOD if you buy a toolbox from the Cy Young estate.
And that’s not all! Thanks to eBay, you also have the chance of having a flower vase that once belonged to Young, for the low price of $199.99! That’s the same price that can get you a hack saw made in 1879 that also was no doubt passed down through the Young family. Throw in an extra $375 and you can get Cy Young’s tie-clasp!
But, these are nothing compared to the crown jewel of Cy Young’s estate on eBay. No, they all pale in comparison to this:
CY YOUNG’S POCKET KNIFE.
Yes, you can buy CY YOUNG’S POCKET KNIFE off of eBay. Just imagine what this knife has been used for! For all we know, Denton True Young may once have gotten into a knife-fight with Ty Cobb using this. I mean, we’ll never know for sure, but it can’t be totally discounted, right?
However, my enthusiasm is dampened by the horrible truth that you may not have been able to glean from the above image. No, to see the truth, you must… ENHANCE!
Las Vegas, Nevada. What would Cy Young’s knife be doing in Sin City? Well, the truth is, it’s only in Las Vegas a nice legal fiction to hide the truth from us. You see, the real location of Cy Young’s pocket knife is actually about 83 miles northwest of Vegas at a US Military Facility. You know it better as AREA 51. And, deep below A51, a secret alliance of the Illuminati, Knights Templar and the Boras Corporation used blood on the knife to begin a cloning process of Cy Young. Sometime in the next 18 to 22 years, a wave of Cy Young clones will enter the majors, bringing with them the ability to throw complete games on short rest. The entire pitching economy will be overthrown, closers and relievers will be driven to the street, the Rolaids Relief Man award will go unawarded… while the conspirators will profit all the while…
You see, that is why they are now selling it, to get the evidence away from themselves.
“But,” you say, “why would they make it so expensive? It’s over 23 hundred dollars!”
And I say: Gambling debts. Even secret conspiracies did not see Florida Gulf Coast coming this March.
…Anyway. Now you know the truth. Yes… the truth.
Use it as you will.
*I say “semi-humor” because while I make several bad jokes and go on at least one bizarre tangent, it is true that this stuff is on sale on eBay.
In which I write Haiku-style poetry about a potpourri of baseball cards I found in a value pack. Because, well, it’s my blog.
1997 Upper Deck “Star Rookie” Fernando Tatis
Fernando Tatis
Hit two grand slams in one frame
Could be on Twitter
This past week:
This coming week:
Oh boy. The whole saga over Alex Rodriguez keeps getting weirder and weirder. With each passing day, he seems to be finding some new doctor, tweeting out something, making some sort of appearance on radio or TV, or coming under some sort of further Biogenesis news.
So, how does it end? I have come up with EVERY POSSIBLE OUTCOME, and listed them below:
In which I write Haiku-style poetry about a potpourri of baseball cards I found in a value pack. Because, well, it’s my blog.
1989 Topps David Wells (Glossy 1988 Rookies Card)
Completely forgot
that he started as a Jay
I feel great shame now.
In which I write Haiku-style poetry about a potpourri of baseball cards I found in a value pack. Because, well, it’s my blog.
1989 Topps Jim Leyland
Young Mister Leyland
Managing the Pitt Pirates
Has a mustache, too.
The Baseball Continuum 